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"How do I turn our friendship into romance?"
There is this guy that I am attracted to and I have developed feeling for. I have only met him once but I have spoken to him several times on the phone. We know each other on a business level and when we do speak on the phone it’s about business.
I had talked to him quite a bit on the phone before I met him in person. I was instantly attracted to him and we were both kinda smiling and staring at each other like there was some sort of chemistry going on there but neither of us said boo.
Since our meeting I have spoken to him some more and every time I do talk to him I get all butterflies in my stomach. His voice changes tone when he talks to me (it goes really low and soft) and it’s weird.
I called him the other day in error, dialed his number which is 1 digit off from another person and he saw that I called him and he called me right back!
I am not sure what to think... is he into me? I can't just come out and tell him that I am attracted to him so I am not sure where to go from here.
Right now there is no reason for either of us to contact each other (project we were working on is over) so I am trying to think of a way to do this?? Not sure where to go from here.
29 Dec 2004
Name: Beth
Age: 32
Dear Beth,
Since your joint project is over and you two have no reason to keep your relationship on a professional-only basis, I say, go for it! What do you have to lose? He’s not your colleague, he’s not in your circle of friends – aside from that one assignment the two of you shared, you’ve got absolutely no connection to this guy! Therefore, so what if it doesn’t work out, or you read too much into his low and soft sounding voice and he’s actually married with kids, because if you don’t want to, you never have to see him again! And okay, so if you ask him out he might say no. But on the other hand, he might also say yes. But the one thing I can say with absolute certainty is that if you don’t ask him out at all, you’ll never know. So go ahead Beth! What are you waiting for?
And if I had to make a guess (which I think you want me to do) I’d say he’s definitely into you. Even though your joint assignment was already completed, he immediately called you back after seeing your number on his called ID, which tells me he’s more than thrilled about transforming your relationship from professional to personal. And even if you two were still working on the project, who calls back that quickly to discuss business? I certainly wouldn’t! I think he was really excited to get your call, and it would probably break his heart to learn you dialed him by accident!
So where do you go from here? Well, Beth, it’s really very simple. Pick up the phone, dial his number (on purpose this time), and after a few minutes of small talk ask him if he wants to meet for drinks one night after work. Meeting for drinks is a fabulous option because it lacks the pressure and stress of dinner (who pays? Is there food between my teeth? He’s not as great as I thought he was and now I’m stuck here with him through dessert!), all the while offering a casual atmosphere in which to get to know one another better, flirt, have fun and get tipsy!
Just remember, you’ll never get anywhere if you don’t try! So ask him out. You’ve got nothing to lose!
Good luck!
- Marissa
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