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"Even though he cheated I want him back"

My ex boyfriend cheated on me but he broke up with me before I found out. We were together for 2months then broke up and then got back together for three months. I really love him and want him back but he doesn’t seem to care anymore.

How can I forget him?

4 Sept 2006
Name: Beverley
Age: 15

Dear Beverley,

Well to start with, I’d re-read the above letter you sent me over and over and over again. Maybe then it will be clear that your ex, who cheated on you and thus treated you with complete disrespect and disregard, is 100% not worthy of you or you time.

Why, WHY, do you want to be with someone who treats you that way? Someone who doesn’t value you enough to…well…not cheat on you?!

I know it’s difficult – when we date someone for a while, we grow attached not only to them, but to the relationship itself. Things become comfortable, and oftentimes we’ll put up with a bad situation (being treated poorly), because we feel it’s easier than ending things and being on our own. Too many times, we cling to the familiar (even if the familiar makes us miserable), because we think it’s less scary than facing the unknown.

But here’s the thing, just because something’s comfortable doesn’t make it right. Don’t you want to be with someone who wants you back? Because you deserve to be in a relationship where your boyfriend adores you just as much as you do him; where he loves you wholly and unabashedly and would never even dream of cheating on you. Don’t you want to be in a mutually loving relationship where, rather than being treated like a disposable dishrag, you’re treated like the wonderful and one-of-a-kind girl you are?

As I said before, if you really need reminders of why you need to drop your ex and move on, just re-read your letter. Remind yourself that the guy you’re supposed to be with will treat you WELL. He’ll love you completely and won’t need, or want, to look elsewhere for affection. Why? Because you’ll be the only girl he’s capable of, and cares about, seeing.

That’s the type of relationship you deserve. And you know what? He’s out there.I guarantee it. But as long as you remain tied to your ex (emotionally and physically) you won’t be capable of seeing or finding him. So, as much as it may hurt to do so, cut the ties that bind you to your ex – fully release him – and you’ll finally be free to find your real man.

Good luck!

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