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"He has a girlfriend, but I think he likes me"
About six months ago I went to a summer dance at my school and one of the cutest upperclassmen guys started flirting with me. He was dancing funny to get my attention, sat next to me, and even put his arm around me. The thing is, we never could really talk much, because we were both so nervous. When school started I heard him whispering to his friends "that's the girl!" when he found out we had the same class together. His friend was like "She just totally heard you!" and was looking at me. For awhile after that i caught him checking me out, but he never talked to me and we both seemed to nervous to start a conversation.
Now we're getting closer, and in the class that we have together we talk the WHOLE hour. We have so much in common, and can laugh and joke around a LOT. We have so much fun too! The thing is, he has a girlfriend. She seems kind of controlling, but I have a strong sense (a very strong sense) that he likes me. He gives me that 'look' a lot. I hardly ever see them together and when they are together she's the one hugging him/holding his hand/etc. He hardly shows any affection toward her. I don't know what to think, does he like me? If he does then why is he going out with someone he doesn't have anything in common with? I know what that 'look' is. Is he as confused as I am?
18 Feb 2005
Name: Crazy Lunatic Crusher
Age: 15
Dear Crazy Lunatic Crusher,
Yeah, he probably does like you. And okay, his girlfriend might be a little controlling. And sure, maybe he doesn’t have anything in common with her. But that doesn’t change the fact that he’s in a relationship right now and off the market.
The way I see it, this is his problem, not yours. Unfortunately, if he’s unhappy in his relationship, you’re reaping the brunt of his frustrations. You’re the one receiving the attention, affection and flirtation he’s obviously not giving his girlfriend. And while this may seem great and wonderful for you, in reality, it’s not. Because while you’re getting smiled at and flirted with, he’s going home to her, not you.
And he may very well be as confused as you are, and it does seem like he likes you and perhaps even wants to be with you, but this is up to him to figure out. And my best advice to you is to remove yourself from this situation. Because right now you’re growing feelings for someone who is both emotionally and physically unavailable, not to mention, the last thing you want or need is his girlfriend finding out you have feelings for her man! Trust me; it’s not a good situation to be in!
So take a step back, and let this guy figure out what it is he really wants. And in the end, if it’s you, than great! Go for it, be with him and enjoy. But, if it’s not, and if he chooses for whatever reason to stay with his girlfriend, than you need to be okay with that and move on.
Good luck!
Marissa
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