"He isn't asking me out!"

Dear Sarah,

Aside from waving a magic wand and casting a spell on him I don’t really know of any sure-fire way to make him ask you out!

Do I think he’s crushing on you? Definitely! But I also think when it comes to making his move, he’s shy and uber-nervous. I know you want him to be the one who does the asking, but if you really like this guy and want to go out with him, you may just have to step it up and ask him to hang. Otherwise, it’s quite possible you’ll be waiting around forever. And in my opinion, actually going out with your crush, rather than wasting time waiting for him to ask you out, is a far better option!

I’m not saying you have to ask him out on some mega-romantic date – there are countless ‘hang-out’ options that you could suggest to your crush. Too nervous to hang with him one-on-one? Then throw a party, instead! Plan a fun, little get together for you, your friends, your crush and some of his friends. Not only will he be flattered to receive the invitation, but it will create a fantastic opportunity for the two of you to get to know one another better in a social setting, outside of school!

And if parties aren’t really your thing, then plan a group outing and invite your crush along. You could organize a picnic in the park and have each of your friends bring a different food item, gather your posse and check out the latest exhibit at your local museum or get your competitive juices flowing by coordinating a girls-against-guys softball game. These are just a few ideas, but group get-togethers are great because they’re social, pressure-free and fun.

Or, you could just gather up your confidence and ask him if he wants to see a movie with you or maybe go for coffee together one afternoon. The point is, even though he likes you, you can’t coerce him into asking you out. Sometimes when we want something, we’ve just gotta go for it!

And if you’re worried about asking your crush to hang, don’t be; guys find it totally flattering when we girls approach them! Honestly! So often guys have to do all the work; they have to make all the first moves including talking to us, asking us out, paying for dates, etc. I guarantee you that any time we take some of this burden off their backs, they’re thrilled!

Good luck!
Marissa